Twenty Sixteen.

This year I decided to show up to life. I looked in the mirror and learned to love the reflection a little more. I stopped begging the world for affirmations that God has already given me. I chose joy and light more times than I can count. I laughed at all the funny parts. Sometimes I laughed at the sad parts, too. I stepped aside and allowed God to move mountains.  

This year I failed a lot. I watched a few bridges burn and didn’t do anything to stop them. I stood up ready to speak boldly, but the words came out in stutters. I ran in circles from grace and fell down when I grew tired from all of the running. I slammed on my brakes too many times, afraid to collide with truth.

But I kept showing up in all of my mess, realizing maybe that’s what bravery looks like. I sat in silence with my thoughts and shed layers of fears. I tried on my too-big dreams, which fit better than I remembered. 

This year I dug deep down in my soul, expecting to find a lone girl with broken bones.

Instead, I found an army. 



Alex FlySeekingComment
Everything Broken

 

I look around at everything broken

And whisper, “I’m broken too.”

I look around at everyone shattered

And try to fix them with glue

 

I want to find the biggest bleeding hearts in the room

And go with them to pass out band-aids

I want to love people offensively,

Without pretense or pride

But I keep tripping over my own chaos

I keep trying to hide

 

Turns out band-aids can't cure cancer

Or heal battle wounds

 

All this time I’ve been waiting

I’ve been waiting to be set free

And along comes God,

Infinitely bigger and better than me

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I hold out my hands,

Expecting to be punished,

Expecting to be hurt

But instead He offers His own hands,

Perfectly pierced, perfectly torn

Jesus looks at me and utters,

“Don’t worry. You are already reborn.”

 

I try to argue with Him

Because I don’t understand

Why would He offer me

Those perfect, holy hands?

I try to tell Him I’m not deserving

And this might be a waste

But He turns to me and beckons,

“Trust me. This is mercy. This is grace.”

 

 

-Alex Fly



Alex FlySeeking, PoemsComment
2016 Gift Guide

I know Christmas isn't about the gifts, but I still find myself a tad panicky when trying to find the perfect something for friends and family every year, so I love a good gift guide. Here's a little list of fun and thoughtful gift ideas for your people!

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FOR THE INSTAGRAM OBSESSED

Artifact Uprising Gift Card

FOR THE COFFEE ADDICT

Mug Warmer

FOR THE CHRISTMAS PARTY HOSTS

Christmas Icon Mug

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FOR THE HARD TO BUY FOR...

Maker

Cook

Southerner

Mama

Teacher

Merry merry, the King is coming!

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P.S. 2017 is right around the corner! If you read this post, you already know some things will be changing around here, and I can't wait to share a few exciting things that are in store for this business. As I continue to meet you in your inboxes and take on new clients, I will be taking down most of the current product offerings at the end of the month...so if you've been eyeing something over there, now is the time to grab it!



Alex FlyResourcesComment
I love people, but not enough.

People are funny. We are all so quirky and unique, holding a thousand different stories in the palms of our hands. Sometimes we want others to ask us about these stories, and sometimes we don’t. We are full of passion and depression and fear and joy. We all carry a few scars, some of us more than others. We have freckles sprinkled over our noses and pain in our eyes; we hold onto hope like a lifeline from our sinking ships. Most of the time, we are wandering around just searching for the lighthouse that points the way back home. 

I will never stop being amazed by people—their stories and tendencies and the subtle making or avoiding of eye contact. I will never stop being amazed by humans and our ability to love and hate and hold hands, run and fall and get back up again. We are crazy and misunderstood and a misfit tribe of rebellion. We’re all a little mysterious, aren’t we? Even those who wear our hearts on our sleeves, like we’re slipping on a favorite shirt… we all keep changing eventually. 

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The one thing that seems consistent, though, is that people keep surprising me, and I keep surprising people. We will constantly disappoint and hurt each other, stumbling through the everyday with our wounds wide open. Despite all of the good and love we pour out at times, we are imperfect and flawed and failing. There is only One who can satisfy our thirsty souls.

This truth doesn’t mean I don’t love people. Gosh, I love people. Sometimes my heart actually hurts because of how much I love people, each and every one of you brave, beautiful souls. But my one true hope does not rest on any of us.

I empathize with people, too, because I think all of us are trying to find God, even if we don’t realize it yet—that He’s the patch to the hole in our hearts we’ve been trying to fill. We try to fill up our hearts with sex and slander and booze, soulmates and sports and careers. But when we look to the world to fulfill what only God can, we will be hit with a wrecking ball of disappointment every single time. What we thought could make us whole left us with a more noticeable hole, and maybe what we've been searching for all along is holiness. Because these things and people of this world will keep us searching until we find that there is only One who remains enough to patch our broken hearts.

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The love of Jesus is the only thing that can hold me up. The cross is the perfect and holy sacrifice that I so desperately need. I am shattered pieces of china that God keeps gluing back together. I am just a heap of bones that God chased after and breathed life into, tripping over myself and aching for glory.

I will keep failing you, and people will keep failing me, but He will remain faithful.



Alex FlySeekingComment
Vote for ________

Tomorrow we go out and vote for our next president. Hopefully we can agree that our options aren’t great. In fact, this whole election season has me a little crazy. I came pretty close to deleting my Facebook account until all of the articles and arguments blow over.

And I get it, because we are a passionate, diverse people group. We are all shaped by different life experiences and possess a need to feel seen and heard. We believe deeply in our convictions, and we aren’t going to stand on the sidelines silently. We are going to fight for those causes that we believe in, and we should. I’m confident that the Lord wants us to be engaged in the world, to be advocators for the helpless and hurting. We shouldn't shy away from the hard things. 

But can we just take a deep breath for a second?

 

I want to write to you gently today, dear friends, and I’m writing as much to myself as I am to you. Because there are people out there pledging the end of real, long-time friendships based on political disagreements this season. There are people spewing hateful words and casting stones from behind screens. There are hearts being broken because of a believer’s words and labeling of them. Can’t you imagine that Satan is loving every second of this chaos? 

Sure, I think a lot of us are afraid. We are afraid that Roe v. Wade will never get overturned, that we will stop caring about those in poverty, we will stop loving on gays and African Americans and white-collar workers and refugees. We are afraid that the government will take all of our money or they won’t take enough of it, or that the United States will never be the great country it once was.

And although we are confident that the Lord is sitting on His throne, mostly I think we are all just trying to love people the best way we know how... we just get a little off track sometimes. Underneath it all, we are trying to be faithful to what the Lord has called us to on this earth, in this specific time and place. I think (and hope) most of us have done our research; I think we take our voting rights seriously and we are attempting to make our country the best version of itself.

I believe a lot of us truly want what’s best for our neighbors. Friend, may we never lose sight of the supreme Truth: what’s best for them is Jesus.

So however you think the advancement of the Gospel can prevail in the best way—vote for that. However you believe you can best show Christ’s love to the helpless—vote for that. Stand up for life—in the womb and out of the womb and in the church and out of the church. Stand for or against the policies and laws that you believe in upholding or dismissing according to Scripture. As we know, there are big consequences in this election, and must hold fast to our convictions. We must hold fast to the Word of God. 

I’m not here to tell you whom to vote for, because I think you’re capable of making your own decisions. I’m just here to tell you that no matter whose name you check on that ballot, I still love you and your perfectly imperfect self. I know that sounds silly and ideological, but it’s true.

In the end, when we’re standing in front of the throne, we only have to answer to one Guy. In the end, there’s only one Judge. It’s not the media or our work friends or our favorite Christian writers. We must answer to the God who gave up His Son for us, who loves us in the dark places and in the light, who hands out forgiveness to the least deserving of us. So however you think you can best glorify the beautiful, magnificent Creator of the universe—vote for that. 

Keep fighting for what you believe in, but never let it overshadow Whom you believe in. Keep showing up in love and mercy and grace, like our Father shows up for you.

 

There’s always room for you here,

Alex



Alex FlySeekingComment
Solving Puzzles

Sometimes I think life is just one giant puzzle. I feel like my little life is separated into 1000 pieces and God is slowly and methodically putting all of my pieces together. But He doesn’t always start with the edge pieces, because that would make too much sense. He decides to put a few wonky-shaped pieces together here and there, and I’m left looking at what seems to be parts of a zebra and a racecar, scratching my head and thinking, “What the heck is this going to be?”

If you haven’t noticed, I write a lot. I have a few Word documents that I fill with jumbled thoughts and childhood stories and life anecdotes. Mostly I write about God, because when I’m not thinking about Him, I want to be.

For me, reflection and writing help me put together a few pieces of this giant, confusing puzzle of life. I can look back and see that the most difficult things I’ve faced thus far were so clearly there to bring me closer and closer to Jesus. Dear God, I wish that heartbreak and trials weren’t part of the puzzle. I wish more of the pieces involved singing in the car on fun road trips and taste testing flavors of cake. I wish the pieces that contained loss of friendships or fights with family members were all replaced with happy tears and job promotions.

Yet most of the time, there are just a lot of seemingly-unconnected shapes lying in a mess on my bedroom floor, and I’m left agonizing over the outcome of the completed picture. I won’t see the glimpses of heaven until much later.

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But one day I’ll look back and see that God was putting together jigsaw pieces of His glory all along. And I’ll stop trying to connect the pieces myself and trust that He has a plan.

And I might just begin making leaps of faith and forgiving the unforgivable, knowing that God keeps forgiving me. I might sing Hallelujah through the hurt and hand out grace to my least favorite people. And then God will probably draw me to love those same unlikely people, because that’s the kind of wild thing He does.

And I might just smile at the fact that most of the time I have no idea what I’m doing, but I’m confident that God is orchestrating a stunning picture behind the scenes, so I’m okay with the not-knowing at the moment. I’ll look down at my crazy pile of puzzle pieces and be thankful for my weird, wonky, beautiful life. 



Alex FlySeeking, IdentityComment